Live, Learn, Write

Have you ever struggled with describing emotions?

Have you ever thought about why you might struggle?

Sometimes, I do.  But recently, I discovered how to overcome that.  Here's how it started.  I did something embarrassing!  This might be an everyday thing for some people, but it's not for me.  I don't really get embarrassed that often. 

Would you like to know what embarrassed me?  I'll tell you, but there's just one thing to keep in mind, though.  I say weird things.  I do.  I'm kind of weird.  Does it bother me?  Not usually.  I figure life's much more enjoyable and filled with laughter when it's a little weird.  It's so much better than being boring.  Any level of boring.

Anyway, while I was at a bridal shower, I said something weird.  And it was only embarrassing because of the way other's reacted.  I made a joke about how I knew the bride and the only reaction I got was a couple dozen wide eyes on overly confused faces.  Really.  It was the wrong crowd.  

More importantly is how I felt.  My face was on fire!  Instantly.  It sought escape throughout my body and left a sizzling wake in its path.  The heat spread from my head to the tip of my fingers and toes.  I tried to smooth it over quickly so they could move onto the next person.  Then I sank back and just hoped that I blended in the chair, wall, carpet, anything.  The worst part about the whole embarrassing situation was that the fire continued to rage throughout my body for the rest of the party.  My ears felt like glowing embers.  I couldn't get everyone's faces out of my head.  I thought about my comment over and over and over again.  For the next three hours!

So, the next time I write about a character who has been embarrassed, I will REALLY know how they felt.  And I love that.  

Live and learn.  

Of course, we might not need to live everything.  I'm not sure I want to go out and become a mass serial killer or cheat on my husband by flirting with another man.  I don't do those things.  I kind of live life on the good side and I'm very much in love with my husband.  

How can we learn then?  Watch movies, read books, and most importantly, learn from others.  I don't know a lot of vampires, fairies, smurfs, magicians, or human computers (although some people I know certainly come close), but just the other day I got to listen to a full report from a very good friend about her love life.  

I soaked in every detail and felt her excitement.  I put myself in her shoes and let the happiness and love permeate my whole body.  It was just like living it.  My emotions got all tied up in the story.  Now when I want to add a little flirty fresh look to a lovey scene, I can remember the giggle that just wouldn't stay down.  Or the chills that shook my shoulders and the excitement that hurt my cheeks from the smiles.  My adrenaline made me hungry for more and my heart thumped wildly just at the thought of them being together.  

Live it.  Learn it.  Write it.


What do you do when you're stuck writing an emotion?