Show Not Tell Crusader Challenge

You might be wondering where my usual Aspiring Author interview is. Let's just say I drop the ball every now and then. This is one of those times. 


But it all worked out because now I get to do the final Crusade Challenge! 


Here are the requirements:
In 300 words or less, write a passage that shows (rather than tells) the following:

• you're scared and hungry
• it's dusk
• you think someone is following you
• and just for fun, see if you can involve all five senses AND include these random words: shimmer, saccadic, substance, and salt.

Rach sure knows how to issue a challenge. I'll accept that challenge with this...

I ducked under a branch and my foot sunk into a rotted log. A bead of sweat trickled toward my brow but I shook it away and glanced up the hill. My last informant insisted that I would reach the ocean by morning. That would've been twelve hours ago. If I didn't get there soon, the free-thinkers would reach the village first. They might've done so already.  

If that was the case, the fed's would kill me.

I crawled up the hill, dragging my body over moss and roots. Halfway up, the smell of salt stung my nose. It burned my throat and coated the roof of my mouth with a filmy bitter substance. I gagged but nothing came.

Snap, a noise startled me in the distance.

Oh crap! Whether it was the fed's or a free-thinker, I had to hurry. Dirt wedged under my nails as I shoved off the ground and wobbled forward. My heart thumped faster with each breath. Only three more steps.

The noise came again. This time right behind me. I fell forward and came to a sudden stop, my head hung over the edge of a cliff. The fading light shimmered on the ocean's surface below. There was no way down.

"Stop," a voice cut through the air.

I rotated my head and eyed the man. A free-thinker. Not just any-free thinker, though. It was the leader, his fingers wrapped around a mega-taze.

A knot tightened in my stomach. The game plan had changed. He was never trying to win the race. I was his prize. Me. The fed's last hope. If I turned into a free-thinker, I'd be as good as dead.

I took a saccadic glance between the crashing water and the man behind me. I wasn't ready to die.

And I hope you liked it! Have a great weekend and happy writing :)